On the Bright Side

This recovery process has had it's ups and downs, and I have to say that a few days ago it was more on the down side. It's been pretty stressful around here lately with how much is going on with my dad's surgery and mine. I was in an awfully horrendous mood, and I am in awe of how my mom and Kevin haven't kicked me to the curb and abandoned me yet.

I thought I would be working at my first, big-kid job now, beginning my career in the exact position I wanted to work in. I thought I'd be saving up money and moving out of my parents house since I've been back here since I started grad school. I thought my knee wouldn't still be in a lot of pain nearly 2 weeks after surgery.  I expected to be able to go out to eat with friends still, go to movies, and that I'd have an easier time riding in a car. I also thought I could drive since it's my left leg. My brace is so big that doing anything besides sitting in a recliner is uncomfortable. My contacts are also STILL driving me nuts after multiple eye doctor appointments and new contacts, and this has been going on since January.

I've been frustrated with how long it takes to do everything and frustrated with having to ask for help so much. I've been scared to move too much since it's painful, but even more scared to not move and lose strength or range of motion. I've also been filled with immense guilt for feeling bad about the situation at all, because I know how lucky I am. I have an incredible support system, and this is hopefully just a temporary issue. I've seen plenty of patients who have it much worse, and I should be thankful for all the good health I still have. All of this shouldn't upset me so much. 

So, I've decided to try to look on the bright side of things:

I don't get to begin working when I thought I would, but...

I have the rest of my life to work. Now, I get the summer off! I can enjoy long, lazy days and I get to sleep in every day. It's really nice not worrying about an alarm clock.

Delicious fresh fruit

I have to spend 6 hours a day laying down using a CPM machine, but...

This gives me tons of time to read! I've been finally catching up on reading my Kindle, magazines, books, the newspaper, and short stories. I have also been watching more TV the past two weeks than I have the past 25 years combined. I've never been a big TV person, but I'm finding some shows I enjoy. On that note, I also found out 7th Heaven is on TV again!! Not new episodes, just re-runs, but they haven't had re-runs on for a few years! For anyone who knows me well, you know that is my favorite show of all time. I don't care how cheesy it is. 

So much to read, so much time (finally)

My pain meds were making me nauseous all the time and my appetite has shrunk from sitting around doing nothing but...

I lost some weight without trying at all. Hooray. That never happens! And I've been eating so much chocolate! I know this will come back to bite me in the butt when my appetite picks up again and I'll gain it back, but for now I don't mind.

Enjoying my birthday treats

Both of my knees still hurt and this surgery kind of sucks, but...

Hopefully it will feel much better in the next few months than it has in the past 15 years. Also, I found out some more wonderful news today!!! My MRI of my right knee came back, and I don't have osteochondritis dissecans in it!!!!!! I have some arthritis in my patella (knee cap), but they said as of now, I don't need surgery on the right knee. HOORAY!!! :D

I am going to continue to try to look on the bright side, and to keep in mind that "This too shall pass."

Beautiful orchids from my mom. They were a "Congratulations on your first OT job!" gift, but now I'm sort of looking at them as a recovery plant. They change form purple-blue to completely white, and some of them have already started to. Maybe I'll be better by the time they're all white (I enjoy goofy symbolic stuff like that).

Dad Update: My dad came home from the hospital yesterday. He is doing much better than the doctors expected, so he got to come home a few days early! Almost all of his symptoms from before surgery are gone already, which we are SO thankful for! He's having a difficult time getting comfortable sitting anywhere, but he's okay when he's laying in bed and he doesn't seem to be in too much pain. He's going stir-crazy already though, so we're trying to think of stuff to keep him busy that doesn't involve bending, lifting more than 5 pounds, or twisting. 

Also, Happy 27th Birthday to my older brother, John! Time is flying. I can't believe you're married and have 2 kids now. I hope your birthday was a good one :)